It's been a while...

So I haven't posted in a while. I KNOW! I'm a shitty blogger.  But then I remember I  don't owe you guys anything and I feel a little better.  School is coming to an end and it's just in time.  I can not stand pretending like I care about grades. Its funny when people bitch saying "I've never gotten a B in a class!" because neither have I... but under different circumstances.  And I don't see the point of teacher evaluations.  It doesn't really need to be 'anonymous' because all my professors by now have figured out if I love them or hate them.  Finals suck, but studying sucks more.  I just can't bring myself to look in a book when I could just as easily ride my bike around in the awesome weather.  You guys all play bookworm, I'll be making French Toast and drawing weiners on my coffee table.

Last weekend I was confront by a drunk group of bachelor party bros.... Seriously, that mentality is insane.  How on earth did bachelor party traditions start?  "Oh hey, you're getting married tomorrow and living the rest of your life in love? Let's fuck that up real quick before it's too late".  You start off by getting hammered drunk. (Nothing has ever gone wrong there).  Then you head to a strip club.  Why spend hundreds of dollars on something that in 24 hours you're going to get every night? And yes, I will have my wife dance for me whenever I want. That's part of my pre-nup.  I don't care how shitty your day at work was, you're putting on the lynard skynard crop top and hiking boots and throwing down to a David Banner CD while I eat pizza on the couch.  I'm stronger than you, you have to do it.  Plus strip clubs are an overall waste of money. I've got the internet, vitamin water, a stereo, and a light switch.  I don't need to pay a cover charge.  THE ONLY TIME I will ever go to a strip club is if there is an all you can eat buffet.  I can bare seeing C-section scars and muffin top belly button peircings for unlimited chicken nuggets.  But then you insist on getting someone to come back and have sex with you.  Your 'boys' pay bunches more money to get you a 25 minute blow job while they all stand outside the door and play beer pong.  I'm going to start a service where I take out ladies on the night of their fiances bachelor party and we see a movie and have a nice dinner then take a walk in the park.  I get a free meal AND I get to know I've ruined someones marriage via being better by comparison.

Just some points before I go:
- My band is going on tour for like 2 and a half weeks next week.  You should like us on FB, and buy our merch off of big cartel, or even send us money so we can eat on tour.  Please and Thank you!

- I'm still accepting CD's, so if you wanna send me that space jam soundtrack or a compilation of all the Bill Nye Science Parody Songs, I'm all ears.

-If you're reading this and you are my pen pal from Louisiana who sent me the CD and we wrote a couple letters back and forth and you just stopped.... what the fuck. Why you gotta leave me hangin?

-Finally, here are some conversations my bestie Andrew and I have. I know you probably enjoy our banter than anything else you text your friends, so here you go.

Found it. 

Mericuh.